The Change Your Life Book

Book excerpt: Making dramatic life changes can be difficult. The true secret to life-long transformation, according to certified professional counselor Bill O'Hanlon, is to take baby steps; small, subtle changes will yield profound and lasting results when added together. In this concise book, O'Hanlon shares his simple formula for making the small changes that lead to big shifts: Change the Doing, Change the Viewing, and Change the Setting. Each simple concept is illustrated with examples of everyday challenges with easy-to-implement experiments for affecting transformation, as in this example from "Change the Viewing": Don't expect, be happy: Ken Keyes developed a simple strategy to be happy: Expect everyone and everything to be exactly as it is. When you are upset, he suggests, it is only because your expectations haven't been fulfilled and you are demanding that reality be as you want it to be, rather than how it is. So expect things to be as they are, and you'll be happy. For the next day or so, every time something happens within you or out in the world that could upset you, shift into expecting it to be exactly as it is. Tell yourself it is exactly as it is supposed to be. As a licensed marriage and family therapist and the author of more than thirty books, O'Hanlon understands that it often takes only simple adjustments to create a better life. With a therapist's keen understanding of what works, O'Hanlon offers straightforward advice that is reminiscent of chatting with a dear friend for achieving simple yet significant life changes.