I'm Right, You're Wrong, Now What?

Book excerpt: They happen every day -- those frustrating, circular "I'm right, you're wrong!" arguments. What's at risk may be as life-changing as whether or not your kid drops out of college, your aging parent goes into a nursing home, or your boss gives you the promotion you want. Or it may be as commonplace as getting the insurance company to approve your claim. These situations often frustrate both parties, stall progress, and hurt relationships. But they don't have to. In I'm Right, You're Wrong, Now What? Dr. Xavier Amador, a Columbia University professor and clinical psychologist shows you how to break nearly any impasse and persuade your opponent -- for that's what people become when you've reached an impasse -- to give you what you need. I'm Right, You're Wrong, Now What is based on Dr. Amador's LISTEN-EMPATHIZE-AGREE-PARTNER (LEAP) method. A highly successful program that has been taught to tens of thousands of people in seminars around the U.S. and overseas, LEAP teaches you how to turn even toxic arguments into healthy disagreements that end with you getting what you need. Built on timeless psychological truths and new research, LEAP is a roadmap for improving the quality and health of any relationship. LEAP will actually show you how to convince the other person to help you, while increasing mutual respect and trust. Perhaps most importantly, it will help you make that all-important distinction between what you want and what you need. Dr. Amador's LEAP program includes techniques on how to: diffuse anger and lower defenses get past stubbornness and even denial make your opponent ask for your opinion . . . instead of railing against it turn adversaries into allies create positive and productive relationships At home, at work and in life, LEAP demonstrates how winning is not about hearing the other person say "You're right," it's about getting him to give you what you need--even when he doesn't agree with you.