Love, Regret and Accidental Nudity

Book excerpt: Why do I suppose my life is fascinating enough to write about? Love? Hmm, between my mom, dad and myself, we've racked up thirteen marriages—if not romantic, certainly optimistic. Regret? Well, if embarrassing, eye-squinting, throat closing, breathless, cringing describes it…I've got a few tales to tell, like budget plastic surgery and herding roaches at a party. Accidental nudity? My nudity is about as spontaneous as a space shuttle launch—even so, there's still the unexpected.