Outstanding Short Plays, Volume Two

Book excerpt: THE STORIES: CAMBERWELL HOUSE by Amelia Roper. Elderly neighbors Annie and Olive have been friends since they were children. At twenty, they agreed to "knock each other off" if they were still alive at seventy-five. Now they are seventy-five and one of them has changed her mind. A tale of old age, murder, and ginger nut biscuits. (1 woman.) THE CLOSET by Aoise Stratford. Kevin's dad has thrown his favorite toy, Bart Sponge, into the back of a closet. There, Bart meets a toy dinosaur and another toy he can't even begin to identify. Does a supposedly gay toy have a chance of making it out of the closet? (2 men, 1 woman or man.) CLOSING COSTS by Arlene Hutton. After viewing four hundred apartments, has Harris finally found the right co-op, or simply the right real estate agent—Alice? Harris must decide if it's time to trade in his artificial fish—and finally grow up. (1 man, 1 woman.) FREEFALLING by Aurin Squire. Two passengers and a stewardess on a falling plane give their moment-by-moment account of what happens when tomorrow is no longer certain. (2 men, 1 woman.) POISON by John Patrick Shanley. Kenny has seen the depths of Kelly's self-hatred, and he'll never date her again—unless he drinks a fortune-teller's mysterious potion, which will kill his soul as dead as Kelly's. Can Kelly convince him to drink the potion? Can she convince herself? (1 man, 2 women.) SELF-TORTURE AND STRENUOUS EXERCISE by Harry Kondoleon. Carl tells Alvin that he's in love with another woman. "Good for you," says Alvin, who refuses to accept that Carl's, Adel, wife only attempted suicide—she's still alive. The woman Carl loves is Alvin's wife, Beth. But right now, Beth is so drunk she can't get up off the floor, much less run off with Carl, and Adel comes in with bandaged wrists saying Carl has been trying to kill her. These four have some issues to work out. (2 men, 2 women.) A SINGULAR KINDA GUY by David Ives. Mitch is a young guy talking to a girl in a bar. She's nice, but he's got this sort of confession, see. There's something she ought to know—on the inside, he isn't really a guy at all. He's an Olivetti electric self-correcting typewriter. (1 man.) SOMETHING FROM NOTHING by David Riedy. A stranger's intimate gesture on a New York subway causes a couple to reexamine their relationship, and it causes one person to get punched in the face. Told from all three characters' wildly different perspectives. (2 men, 1 woman.) THERE'S NO HERE HERE by Craig Pospisil. Lance moves to Paris to follow his dream of becoming a writer, but his work goes badly. As does his relationship with Juliette, a beautiful Parisian. But a strangely familiar woman at their local bistro forces Lance to dig deeper into himself. (2 men, 2 women.) YOU HAVE ARRIVED by Rob Ackerman. Dan and Kristin are navigating their first date, and fortunately, the other woman with them knows the way through the confusion into Brooklyn. That would be Cyndi, the GPS system in Dan's car. (1 man, 2 women.)