Single, Shy, and Looking for Love

Book excerpt: What if he thinks I’m not good looking enough? What if she thinks I’m boring? What if I can’t think of anythingto talk about? When it comes to dating, most people have had these thoughts and fears at some point. The truth is that going on a date can be downright nerve-wracking—and if you suffer from shyness or social anxiety, it is especially so. So how can you stay calm, cool, and collected as you set out on the search for the perfect mate? Single, Shy, and Looking for Love presents mindfulness, acceptance, and values-based techniques from acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) to help shy singles like you get “in the game,” cope with the anxiety and fear that can arise on a date, and go on to create long-lasting, intimate relationships. By learning to stay focused in the present moment, you’ll arm yourself against the catastrophic thoughts that cause you to buckle under pressure. And by connecting with your own core values, you’ll gain a greater understanding of yourself and what you ultimately want in a romantic partner. Confidence is often considered one of the most attractive qualities a man or woman can have, and social confidence will take you far—not only in love, but in life as well. If you’re ready to stop being a wallflower and start putting yourself out there, this book will give you the skills you need to get back in the dating game and find the love you deserve.