You and Me, Never Us

Book excerpt: An occasional mysterious dream man haunts Shreya in her thoughts and in the broad light of the day. We do not know who this person is that she talks too often within herself. She is haunted by reality as much as she is haunted by this stranger of a man. Her love and lust for him have grown manifold, and she does not know how to keep away from his thoughts. She is growingly becoming hotter and more tempting to him, and there is no way he can ignore her as well. Is it all a play in her own mind, or is there really someone with voyeuristic instincts seeking her absolute submission? She is married and has been so many years with a hard-working bloke, Tapas, who seems to love her through thick and thin. However, his love is not enough to arouse her in her absolutely lonely hours. She is really very upset and mortified by this harsh man, who gives her sexual dreams and plays with her head, and thus we recognize women like her could be so vulnerable, and maybe she is also a writer in the hiding. An exceptionally gifted mother, who never finds her voice, she is aroused and also told to follow her own life path and gets many premotions to chase her dreams and career and choices in her life. She goes through many awakenings, and thus her life becomes altogether a different one after the entry of this man, who had called upon her dreams in ways that are unknown to others. She is feeling depressed. Is he the reason, or is she herself making it out to be too much? What is her dilemma? Why is she so sad? She is a mother who needs her daughter’s love and, basically in her battles with Tapas, she realizes what a flawed marriage she is living through these years. She seeks more and aims to better her life, but would it be at the cost of losing her own husband or the man in her dreams? Do we find out? Her therapist, who she goes to for consultation, has decided after many sittings to put her on medication for concocting realities that she cannot come out of. She is clearly depressed and has had no friends, much to her disgrace, although she thinks she is happier without all. She is constantly seeing someone in her mind’s eye, and she is troubled by him and his thoughts. She is even mumbling words to him and he is doing the same to her.