A Dude's Guide to Baby Size

Book excerpt: The viral video star behind Dude Dad offers a humorous and heartfelt guide to helping expectant fathers survive and thrive during the wild ride that is forty weeks of pregnancy. Numerous apps and books exist to help expectant parents understand their baby’s development by comparing their unborn child to a raspberry or a stalk of broccoli, but Taylor Calmus takes issue with that. First off, your baby is not some wimpy little vegetable. Your baby is a hardcore little lug nut who is straight-up growing organs on a weekly basis. Second, how big is a stalk of broccoli? And what the heck is a kumquat? Clearly this situation calls for a better approach. Enter . . . A Dude’s Guide to Baby Size. • At week nine, your little shredder resembles the circumference of a guitar pick. • At week twenty-four, your budding jalapeño is the size of some concession-stand nachos. • By week thirty-four, your little lopper is now the size of a sixteen-inch largemouth bass that weighs four to five pounds! This book is full of fun facts about your growing baby, advice on how to help Mom-to-be, as well as ideas and encouragement for you on your journey from Dude to Dude Dad. Buckle up for a wild ride full of maternity metaphors, gnarly playlists for all the special occasions, new parenting tales, dos and don’ts for expecting dads, and even an entire chapter dedicated to beef brisket!