The Golden Book of Resentments

Book excerpt: In analyzing the various principles of Alcoholics Anonymous we now come to one which has come up for more discussion, and which is at the bottom of more difficulties than any of all the ones listed. This principle is: “THE DANGER OF RESENTMENT—SELF PITY” In the alcoholic, “frustration begot resentment, resentment begot self-pity, self-pity begot drinking, and drinking begot frustration, and frustration begot resentment, and resentment begot self-pity,” and on and on and on—in an unending cycle, until faced with the three-pronged choice: sobriety or insanity or death. And then we chose sobriety in A.A. And we learned the principle that: If the alcoholic repeated any PART of the cycle, the ENTIRE cycle would repeat ITSELF, “in toto.” We learned through the above principle that to the alcoholic, resentment and self-pity would always remain his number one twin-enemy—no matter how long sober. And this means that, if he permits himself to indulge in resentment or self-pity too frequently or for too prolonged periods of time, he will automatically set off the compulsion to drink. In short: AN ALCOHOLIC CANNOT TOLERATE RESENTMENT. If he does, there automatically will begin the old pattern: “stinking-thinking; drinking-thinking; drinking.” And so also will it be with any part of the cycle above: If the alcoholic takes a drink, he will automatically and ultimately become full of resentments, etc. etc. We do not know why this happens, but we do know from long, long experience that it does happen.